Setting Up the Stage - Orientation Guide for Firstullas (2014-19)
Setting Up the Stage
Orientation Guide for Firstullas (2014-19)
By: Muhammad Mohsin Ali Dynamo
[currently standing on the bridge between first and second year]
There are people who get into KEMU. And then there are people who don’t. No one resents it, except perhaps your great-grand-khala whose daughter hasn’t made it. And you can count on her to come up with something like this *add acrimonious voice*:
KEMU is one of Pakistan’s most esteemed medical institutions
(apart from the mossy stairs, the decaying buildings and the new auditorium
which has been under construction since the time of Haman), and it is indeed a special
privilege that you made it here. It’s not without reason that we call ourselves
“crème de la crème”. And when a professor chimes it in the class as well, you
realize that you’ve achieved something.
But that is the catch. You’ve made it here, cool. So far, so
good. It’s when you dress something pretty for your first day and return home (if
you can) in the most disheveled state possible, that you realize life is not
all snug and cozy.
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Now, I know this orientation guide is a bit late in the coming,
and the sole reason is the much-stereotyped horror: prof. At the root of a
great many evils, prof is the reason why firstullas haven’t enjoyed the full
fruits of ragging. And it’s the reason why we’re going to guide you after you’re
done with your cell module.
First things first.
Enter: THE KEMU EXPERIENCE
It seems snazzy when you find yourself in a class of 300
intellectuals of the finest quality, and you know you stand in-line with them.
After all, it’s not every day that you wake up and find you’ve made it to KEMU.
At first, you’re confused how to act: proud, cocksure or simply awed? There are
all sorts that fill up the audi: bored thetas who have already studied all the
lectures and are thinking about signing up for USMLE electives; loud, chattering
girls (who, for a reason that has never been really understood, tend to move in
giggling groups); hard-fighters with roguish smiles seemingly carved on their
faces, who have gone through “it” (whatever that might be) and are ready to
take on anyone and everyone; meek newbies, who don’t have a medical soul in
their family tree and are blissfully unaware of what medicine entails; smart nerds,
who speak louder in terms of actions; and finally, the odd person who doesn’t
fit in any category but has still managed to make it here.And while you’re contemplating over how weird life can get, some seniors grab you and intrude (a bit rudely, it must be said) in your contemplation. Before you realize it, you’re being whisked off to Zero Point (no spoilers if you still don’t know where it is and why you must avoid it). And hence starts the enjoyable experience (for us, at least :D) that people know as ragging.
Now ragging has been stereotyped quite a lot. Personally, I
think you just need to chill out and enjoy it. Those seniors are going to stay
with you for the next five years of your life, so there is no need to mess up
with them. Plus, they’ll help you A LOT. You will find that out during prof,
when all your friends have gone into momentary isolation. Ragging is not as bad
as it looks. It teaches you some very important things, one of which is
manners. But then, it has a darker aspect, which nearly everyone dislikes. So
try to use your common sense when someone is ragging you. As far as it is fun,
enjoy it. If it takes on a censored note, take a stand. There’s no need to get
all paranoid.
Now, moving on to the next chapter.
KEMLIFE: THE ESSENTIALS
Pigeons
You might think pigeons as cute and amazing birds, with magnetoception and other bodaciously awesome qualities. Well, there is more than that to them. Pigeons here are one of the essential things you'll experience. Say, you're sitting under the shade of a tree, gazing at any idyllic scene (though those are few) when suddenly, POOP! and you are left cursing and trying to find a source of water. And that is what generations of Kemcolians will always tell you. Sports
There are all sorts of indoor and outdoor games here
at KEMU. Guys can play cricket or football or whatever they like in the big
Patiala ground anytime. Everyone can also play tennis, table tennis, volleyball
and badminton in the boys’ hostel.
Indoor games are best enjoyed in the Business (or Facility)
center, which is that cool little place near Anatomy. You can bring your own
Chessboard, or Ludo, or Monopoly, or whatever, and enjoy to your full.
Sports week is organized during March, and includes Theme
day, Color Day, Fun Fair and loads of other exciting events. If you really want
to enjoy your stay at KEMU, DO NOT miss the sports week. It’s essential that
you attend it if you intend to imbibe the true Kemcolian spirit. There are
Gymkhana events, and indoor games as well, including something exclusively for
all the gamers out there (no spoilers!)
Events
Kicking off with KAC’s heart-warming “Make a Dream”, these
events whisk past as fast as pics in an album. You will love Lights of Hope, Bake
Sale, Annual BaitBaazi, APICS, Intra and Inter-Collegiate Declamation and
Parliamentary Debates, and many other events, including Annual Dramatics, where
acting reaches a new acme, and is redefined in the light of human psychosocial
experience.Class Groups
You must have joined your class group by now. Now there are some general rules about class groups, which you should know.
1.
Try to upload any notes, videos or stuff you
find useful in your class group. This isn’t FSc, where there is a strict
competition for the strongest ratta. Help others, and when the time comes (prof),
you will find help coming from quarters you previously didn’t know existed.
2.
Avoid political discussion. It leads to needless
fights, and no one is amused.
3.
Respect the opinion of others.
4.
If you are listening to a song, or eating
MoongPhali, or simply lying in bed gazing at your ceiling (an entertaining act,
I confess), there is ABSOLUTELY no need to shout about it in your class. You
have you own Facebook wall for a reason. Use that.
Novels and Movies
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You have spent two years living in a
hole: now emerge out of it. Enjoy your life at KEMU, especially your holidays.
Watch some seasons, especially those related to medicine, like House. Watch
movies. Read novels, especially the Harry Potter series (if you haven’t already
read it). There are some seriously amazing novels out there related to medical
life by Robert Cook. Utilize the spare time you get this way.Holidays
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Ah, the word is so beautiful, so charmant, so
panache. Holidays mean fun, right? And food and friends and a lot of sleep.
Sadly, not exactly. Holidays at KEMU are more of utilizing
your time in the best way possible. You need to catch up on your study stuff,
watch movies, hang out with friends, and do everything during a period that
runs towards completion, dammit. What should be your policy? Well, I’ll leave
you to figure out that yourself. I have no intention of becoming Dale Carnegie
and selling self-help books in the future, both distant and near.
Societies
Societies are the best part at KEMU. But here's the catch: I don't want to tell you everything right now. Voices in my head tell me to keep that bit hanging in mid-air. So stay tuned!
Hostel Life
For girls, everything you need to know about hostel life has been briefed by our GR Lubaba here:
http://www.kemunited.com/2014/11/a-new-home-or-just-punishment-by-lubaba.html
For boys, your dorm life will be made easier after reading this handy guide:
http://www.kemunited.com/2013/11/survivng-ultimate-guide-to-happier-dorm.html
Theetas
It's not only okay, it's legit to avoid all these fellows, as they will take the sunshine and butterflies from your life by bombarding you with their "depressors". So BEWARE!
Food
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| And even after that. |
Food is love, food is life. The sad thing is, there are no snazzy restaurants around kemu. The only thing is Al-Kareem, Qasr-e-Shirin and Mohkam. And that "Burger King" outside the Bus-Stand-gate. Trust me, a time will come when you will find a cone bought outside Neela Gumbad better than a magnum bought from a mall.
Let’s turn over a new leaf now.
KEMSTUDIES
This, guys and gals, is what I’m sure you have been waiting
for impatiently. I mean, come on, don’t deny it. All sorts of people make up
this world, but only the most “khapti” ones (in matters of studying) come to
KEMU. Your cell module is done with and over. Just chill a bit. There’s no need
to study for at least a week. Let the happiness sink in before anatomy comes.
So here is a general overview: there are 3 main subjects for
you firstullas: Anatomy, Physiology and Biochem. In the modules, you might have
experienced the occasional (not-so-much) lectures of Molecular Biology,
Pathology, Pharmacology and whatnot. Well, here’s the catch: those lecs are
only restricted to the module. Their main purpose is to help you understand the
proper applications of what you learn in your basic subjects. One more thing:
there’s a commonplace term, “clinicals”. This just refers to the aspects of
your basic sciences which you actually get to see in Wards and clinics. They
are not something out of this world. Bear that in mind.
Now for the actual stuff. There are going to be three
modules, one each for Cell, Respiration and CVS in that order. In modules you
will study anatomy, physiology and biochemistry of the respective topic ONLY.
Plus, you will have some lectures from Medicine, Surgery, Pathology,
Pharmacology and Radiology. These lectures are only meant to enhance your grip
over clinical aspects of basic themes. So don’t fret over them. No one will
kill you with death-stares if you don’t study Robbins’. You are not supposed to
do that. Just stick to your basic subjects and you’ll do fine.
In between modules, you will have intramodullary blocks,
during which everything will be mumble jumble. Say, you will be reading Upper
Limb in Anatomy, Proteins in Biochemistry and Blood in Physiology. So
everything is going to be sorta disorganized. But here’s the good thing: you
won’t have those lecs of Medicine, Pathology etc. Plus, you won’t have a
combined module test at the end.
So now, a little bit about each subject individually.
ANATOMY
In anatomy, you will have four things:
a.
Gross Anatomy
b.
Histology
c.
Embryology
d.
General Anatomy
I hope I don’t need to explain what these are.
Here are the recommended books and the not-recommended books
:D
Gross Anatomy
THE ESSENTIALS
BD Chaurasia’s Anatomy (personally, I’m not inclined in its
favor, but BD is indispensable if you want to pass your exam)
Clinically Oriented Anatomy by KLM—this book is AWESOME. The
main thing to do from here is clinical anatomy.
Netter’s Atlas of Anatomy—you will need this for spotting on
cadavers, as well as reinforcing your knowledge. It’s not really essential that
you use Netter’s, you can use McMinn’s Atlas, or Gray’s atlas as well.
THE EXTRAS
Last’s Anatomy, Regional and Applied—you don’t really need this book. Some teachers do consult this book, and they might ask you a question from it in a substage or a stage. So just go through it once if you have the time after reading BD. It is not really useful for Profs.
Gray’s Anatomy for Students—Again, this book is wonderful
when it comes to diagrams, but a total mishap when you study everything from
it. However, the clinical cases at the end of each chapter are excellent and
you should read them if you want a good explanation. It’s not a favorite for
prof prep.
Snell’s Anatomy—This book is not good as far as basic
anatomy goes. However, the clinical boxes in it are good, and if you want to
build up on your knowledge of clinical anatomy after reading KLM, you should
give them a read.
Histology
THE ESSENTIALS
Liaq Hussain’s Histology—Most of you have been studying it already. Although it gives more explanation than you really require, most students prefer it because it’s simple.
Di Fiore’s Atlas of Histology—do not buy it. I repeat, do
not buy it. You can issue a copy from the library and use it forever. This
Atlas is great when it comes to drawing the diagrams in your histology
notebooks.
THE EXTRAS
Junqueira’s Basic Histology—this is an EXCELLENT book. It’s
the one preferred by Maam Mahjabeen, and it’s pretty good when it comes to
explaining concepts. But it has just a few details which you don’t really
require. In fact, you have a choice: either read Liaq Hussain or Junqueira.
NOT-RECOMMENDED
Wheater’s Histology—it is a good book, but not really for first year students. You might need it in second year though.
Ross’s Histology—this is purely a REFERENCE book. You will
not need it in the first place. Even if you do, just download a copy and give
it a brief look.
Embryology
There are two basic books
KLM’s Clinically Oriented Embryology
Langman’s Embryology
You can study either of these, and it won’t affect your
score much. There are a few topics, which are best done from either book, but
your seniors will tell you that when the time comes.
General Anatomy
GA by Tassaduq Hussain—this is the main book that you should
use for GA. It’s going to be enough for you guys.
GA by Liaq Hussain—a good book, but the only thing of note
is the diagrams. Otherwise, Tassaduq is best.
Review and MCQ Books
Friends’ Yellow MCQS—they are good, but not immaculate.
Anatomy MCQs by Bhatnagar and Roy S. Choudhry—this is an
excellent book which you must have to solve MCQs.
BRS Anatomy—this is a good book, but you only need to do the
MCQ given at the end.
EXAMS IN ANATOMY
In gross anatomy, you will study three regions: Upper Limb,
Lower Limb and Thorax. Each region is further divided into three or four
sub-parts. Once you read each sub-part, you will have an exam called a
substage. In a substage, you’ll only have a viva in which you’ll be marked out
of 100.
Once you study all sub-parts, you will have a composite exam
called a STAGE. This extends for three days: one for written exam, one for
spotting and radiographs and one for viva.
For histo and GA, you will have a short test after your March
break. This is easy peasy.
For embryo, you may or may not have a test. So chill out.
PHYSIOLOGY
You will study the following things in Physiology: Cell,
Nerve and Muscle, Blood, Respiration, Body Temperature Regulation, Heart, and
Circulation. Out of these, you have studied cell and will study Respiration,
Heart and Circulation in the Modules. The rest will be taught in Intramodullary
block.
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| Physiology Lectures be Like... |
BOOKS
THE ESSENTIALS
Guyton’s Medical Physiology—Guyton is going to be your constant, bedside companion for the next two years. Nuff said.
THE EXTRAS
Ganong’s Physiology—this is a high-yield book, and a very good one. It just delves into too many details, so you don’t really need to study it except for some topics.
Sembulingam’s Medical Physiology by JAYPEE—again, a good
local book, which many students prefer over Guyton. I admit that it has some
good topics, but it’s not the ideal book out there. Still, if you just want to
pass the exam, read this one.
NOT-RECOMMENDED
Sherwood’s Physiology—some teachers have read it, but that
doesn’t mean you need to do so as well.
Vander’s Medical Physiology
Rhoades Medical Physiology
Berne and Levy Physiology
REFERENCE BOOKS
Boron and Boulpaep’s Physiology—it goes into too many
details, so use it only as a reference. Again don’t buy it, just download it.
Review Books
BRS Physiology—the best physiology review book out there. It’s
concise, to-the-point, and really great. Plus, the MCQs given at the end come
in prof and send up exams.
BRS Physiology Cases and Problems—another excellent book,
which will help you get the hang of clinical scenarios.
Firdaus’ Physiology—I am not sure, but I’ve heard it’s
another excellent book for revision and review. It doesn’t have any mcqs
though.
Mini Guyton—It’s like Guyton with all the extra stuff removed.
You can use it for revision.
Guyton Physiology MCQ review—don’t use this one, as MCQs from
it rarely come in your exams.
TESTS
For physiology, you will have tests comprising mcqs and
short questions. One thing: you need to pass all physio tests. This is because
the current HOD is perhaps the only one who focuses A LOT on internal
assessment. If you have passed all tests, well and good. If not, steel yourself
for a bisti program.
BIOCHEMISTRY
You will study the following topics here: Physiochemical
Principles, Carbohydrates, Proteins, Lipids, Enzymes, Plasma Proteins,
Oxidative Phosphorylation, Vitamins, Minerals, GIT, Nucleotides, Acid-Base
Balance, Eicosanoids, Water and Electrolyte balance.
Books
THE ESSENTIALS
Mushtaq Biochemistry Vol. 1 & 2—Mushtaq is for biochem as Guyton is for physio. It’s hell essential.
Lippincott’s Biochemistry—this is another must have.
THE EXTRAS
Hashmi’s Biochemistry—you need to do only the end of chapter mcqs from it. And prepare a few topics like plasma proteins from this book.
Satyanarayana Biochemistry—a good book, but you only need to
do minerals from here.
REVIEW BOOKS
Faiq’s Biochemistry—it’s a concise summary of Mushtaq, ideal
for quick revision.
NOT-RECOMMENDED
Harper’s Biochemistry—I was surprised to know some firstullas
have actually read this. Whatever happens, Harper’s is and remains a reference
book. Do not use it for basic study.
Chatterjea Biochemistry—it is not even relatable to you
guys. So don't waste time and money over this.
TESTS
You will have tests after each topic i.e. carbohydrates,
proteins etc. Tests include only SEQs and LEQs.
PRACTICAL EXAMS
You’ll have practical classes per schedule. Try to attend
the ones for histology at all costs, and try to make diagrams while you’re in
class.
Make your copies neat and clean and get them checked.
Your practical exam will consist of three portions: Written,
Performance and Viva. In histo practical exam you will only need to identify
some slides and draw diagram for one major slide. The rest you'll learn when you get there.
IMPORTANT STUFF
All the important stuff regarding studies is regularly
uploaded here at the first year page on Kemunited. Try to keep track as you’ll find a
lot here, including important questions, past papers, video and animation links
and a lot more.
The Closing Line
Always remember that the main purpose of your stay in med
school is to become a proper “human” as well as a doctor. Respect your seniors,
as respect begets respect.
Enjoy as much as you can, because at the end of the year,
you realize that studying is not the only thing out there. There’s much more to
KEMU than some people realize.
And finally, remember the aunty-acid remark: You have achieved
something, but it’s only a milestone, not the ultimate goal.
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