"Getting candid with the man behind it all."

"Getting candid with the man behind it all."

Interview by Amna Khalil and Fazila Gondal

Behind the antiquity, the grandeur, the magnificence of King Edward is a man , with a shabby smile and teeth of gold.

He is, in some twisted manner, the reason for our being.
 He is the reason a few gluttonous of us have the courage to get out of bed in the morning and come to university.

What he does, what he creates, out of his ashen hands is the stuff of chubby dreams , the ultimatum of all seductive temptations we have to curb.

Yes, we are talking about none other than our very own “Guddu Uncle”.

Uncle, can we ask you a little about yourself, like an interview?
“Baji,  Aap mujhey btadein kia kehna hai.
Aaj se pehley kabhi kuch aisa kia nahi”

So what does your NIC card read, “Guddu”?
(smiles) My real name is Zulfiqar.

So why “Guddu”?
“Jab se hosh sambhala hai, guddu hi suna hai”




Who gave you this interesting nickname?
“My nani.”

Phir “Guddu fries” hi kiun? , why not “Zulfikar kay mashoor tasty fries” or “Lovely Chips”?
“Aap tu Guddu naam k peechey hi parr gayi hain”

From behind enemy lines.

(We look at the ground sheepishly and curse ourselves on our lack of intellect)
Uhhh , so how long have you been working here and where did you work before?
“Four, five years have passed since I started this business.
Before this , I used to do DVDs ka business, softwares, computer waghera.”


(We imagine Guddu, DJing around, in a sparkly vest , rangeen shades and a polka dots wala handkerchief tied around the neck.)

Ye-a-a-h Baby!!!!!

So what do you do in your free time?
“Waisey tu I am hardly free at all , but I watch t.v , movies e.t.c”


Whats your favourite movie? (Expecting something like “Dil mera, dharkan teri” or “Dabang” )
“ I prefer action movies.
  Like err ,” 300”.
  Also “Water world”

(Jaws drop)
Oh, err wow.
So favourite hero? (Hoping, praying that for once our stereotyping would be spot on and it would be someone like “ Salman Khan” or “Shaan”)
“Jean Claude Van Damme.”

WOAH!!!Guddu loves vegetables too.
FRIED vegetables.

Favourite song?( Now expecting a Guns n Roses or KISS hit)
“ Aake teri baahon mein”

"Aake teri baahoin mein, har shaam lage sinduri
mere man ko mahakaaya, mere man ko mahakaaya"

So tell us about your family?Where do you live?
“Well I have two kids , aik 3 mein hai , aik 2 mein.
Iqbal town mein rehta hun”

So how do they like your fries , aap ghar pe bnatey hain kabhi?
“Ghar mein hakoomat biwi ki.
Bachon kay liye sometimes I take the left over ones but unhen oven mein garam kar k wo baat nahi rehti”

Where do you buy your awesome aaloo from?
“Mewah mandi”

"Aur Uncle, aur!!"

So why outside King Edward , why not Allama Iqbal or some place?
“Pehley peechay anarkali mein tha , bachon ki muhabbat yahan tak layi hai.”

So why more chips for less money, aaj kal k daur mein itni achaai kaisey?
(Laughs ) “Meray bass mein nahi hai , ziada chips dal jatey hain.
Waisey Allah ki rehmat hai , raat ko jaib dekhta hun tu khushi hi hoti hai"

And now we all know a little something about the brains behind the fries.
We LOVE Guddu , don't you?